He seems so nice, Ryan Gosling Meme. He’s always supportive and kind, no matter what. And it’s obvious he’s sincere. He honestly loves the mason jar lamp. And then he and I started to get to know each other a little better. And he started to offer to do things for me. Things like hand massages.
And I started to get a little attached, maybe. Like, I may not be pregnant at the moment, but with a guy as supportive and on the same page as I am, I could be.
So I realized that I needed to marry him. Honestly, I didn’t think it was asking too much to marry the nicest internet Meme ever.
Turns out, it totally was.
The light in my hallway went out. The one above my pantry. So I had to try to find food in the dark. It was horrible. And it stayed that way for DAYS. Ryan Gosling Meme never bothered to fix it. I tweeted my frustrations and Jen, being the wonderful friend and graphic designer that she is, sent me this message. And it was the best thing ever. And, I admit, it totally won me back. (What can I say? I’m slutty for the Doctor.)
But you know what? He didn’t change it after I went to bed. And he didn’t change it the next day either.
And I got really kind of mad at him. No, really. You think I’m just writing this line in character with this blog post, but I so totally am not. I was pissed. At an internet meme. For not changing my lightbulb. Thank god I’m cute.
Luckily, just about then, Nathan Fillion Meme came along to sweep me off my feet.
Only, then I got a little annoyed with actual Nathan Fillion. I mean. If Wil Wheaton can send The Bloggess a picture of himself collating paper AND holding twine, and then every other celebrity on the planet can send her a picture of themselves holding random objects without her even asking them, why can’t Nathan Fillion? And I realize I’m supposed to follow the request by not harassing him anymore, so to be clear: I’m definitely not. This entry is totally about me and how I’m crazy, not about how he’s too good for twine. (Oh, god, what if he’s allergic, but too embarrassed to say so? This changes everything.)
Anyway. Point being that I decided I needed a new Meme to marry. So I started shopping around. First I tried John Cusack.
And he has a point. And I’m definitely intrigued. But there are two things wrong with this. First, he’s making promises again. He’s setting me up to get my heart broken again. Second, it turns out Ewan McGregor makes a way better pensive face.
And he’s realistic about his promises.
And he quotes John Denver songs!
And he’s so suave he can take the blame for something without even promising to fix it.
And he totally wants to French kiss me.
Oh, Ewan McGregor Meme, yes Yes you can!