I am going to regret this come morning.

5 07 2011

I took Benedryl over 24 hours ago and I’m pretty sure I am still high (facts are not important here, kindly let the butler take them for you). And if it’s not the Benedryl itself, it’s the fact that I watched Twin Peaks right after I took one. Which I either recommend or don’t recommend depending on what exactly you are looking to experience or avoid. (Also spell check says “Benedryl” isn’t a word so it’s possible I’m SO high I’m making it up.)

Anyway, on my way to bed I read this post by The Bloggess wherein she states that the plural of octopus is not, in fact, octopi. My first reaction was volatile anger (if that’s redundant blame the Benedryl) because you cannot change a SOLID FACT like that on me. But then I felt relief because years ago I saw a book on a shelf at the library clearly titled “Octopuses” and I was SO OFFENDED over it – now I can let that offense go and feel relief in the fact that it is I who am ignorant, not some author/editor/publisher/book seller/librarian (hell, at this point, just blame everything on the Benedryl). But then! I Googled it! And learned that the word “octopus” is totally a shapeshifting alien. I mean, it has three plural forms which include the aforementioned two and also “octopodes”. So from now on octopodes they are. Who’s with me?

In related news, the same Wikipedia article discusses the plural of the word “anus” which makes me wonder the only logical thing one could possibly wonder: Why would you EVER need a plural version of the word “anus”? WHY?

You know what? Don’t answer that. In any case, I am off to bed now with an image of an anal lineup in my mind.

Anal lineup. Here come the Googles. Sorry to disappoint you, internet.

Also: What do you mean Benedryl doesn’t make you high?