Back to School

5 09 2007

Yesterday school started in my neighborhood and it felt very strange not to send my daughter to her first day of kindergarten. Which is weird, because you’d think that for a homeschooler it would feel normal. But I am me and me is usually weird.

I felt a mixture of freedom and disappointment. It feels a little like a milestone I’m getting cheated out of – taking my child to her very first day of school. I don’t get to have those first day of school photos or taking her into a classroom. I don’t get to cry or worry about her like I’m supposed to on that first big step. On the other hand I feel rebellious and free and absolutely thrilled. And of course I would not change a thing (or, you know, I would), but I am allowing myself to mourn the small loss of this great parenting moment because I relish tradition.

And, you know, it will come someday even if she’s 18 and her first day of school is at University. And I will take photos and cry when I walk her to class. And she will probably kick my ass and never speak to me again, but dammit, I will have my moment.

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2 responses

17 09 2007
aisling

We still do the first day of school photos, somewhere that is nearly empty because all the other kids are in school is fun 🙂

3 09 2008
Back to School, Ver. 2.0 « Z E B R A B E L L Y . C O M

[…] to School, Ver. 2.0 3 09 2008 This time last year, I was lamenting the fact that I did not have that classic American moment where I send my little one off to her very first day of Kindergarten. And now? I cannot even […]

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