And now I will finish Big Love. So everyone please stop being awesome for like 2 hours plus recovery time, ok?
May 1
Wow. I’ve never had nightmares about Big Love before. And especially not with Pod Racing scenes. WTF, brain?
May 2
Just helped Elliott with a math problem about how many more balls Peter has than Matthew (answer: 4 more) without giggling ONCE. Reward me.
May 2
David Tennant just said “ass” in a kids’ movie. I love him even more now.
May 2
Elliott: I can’t do lessons. It’s bloody hard!
May 4
I just bought four pairs of jeans for $10. I win.
May 6
Well, but the only reason I’m using the binoculars to look in windows across the way is to see if that was Doctor Who on their TV. (It was.)
May 10
Margie: “Suck it, Yoshi.” #MarioKartRoadRage
May 11
Elliott: If girls are doing bad things and boys are doing good things, then you should have boy manners.
May 11
And now Margie and I are discussing the similarities and differences between Han Solo and Zaphod Beeblebrox. I love my life.
May 11
The light in the living room is flickering but I haven’t fixed it yet because it makes me feel like I’m in the queue for Indy.
May 11
And now has come the phase of the sunburn where I’m all sexily peely. You has a jealous.
May 13
Hoggle from Labyrinth = Gaius from BSG. Discuss.
May 13
E: Where’d Mom go? Did she get teleported to another dimension? M: She got teleported to the bathroom!
May 13
Yesterday I discovered a whole new cup holder in my car.
May 15
I am ROCKING the farmer’s tan today.
May 16
Thomas Hardy is on my shit list.
May 20
That 70′s Show is on Nick at Nite? I do not have enough gray hairs for this.
May 21
Just saw caricatures of the Doctor and Donna at Disneyland. <3
May 23
Rode Dumbo for the first time since I was like 4. Survived. Kind of even liked it maybe.
May 23
Quotes of the night (from the mouths of babes): "That's rated pink underwear!" and "Goodnight, fucky!" #WeAreAwesomeMoms
May 23
My kids slept until after 9am today. I KNOW, RIGHT??
May 24
Baby Mario is an ass mask. #MarioKartRoadRage
May 25
Just got a jury summons for my mom. I hope she's excused. Otherwise I foresee an awkward court case coming up.
May 26
Thanks for the nightmares about giant scary spiders, Tolkien.
May 27
It's the kind of day where I feel anxious for all the stupid reasons. Not legitimate ones like zombies. Although now zombies, too. WTG, me.
May 29
Excuse me while I go watch six hours of Dawson's Creek. Because I'm pretending it's 1998. And that I'm 15. #relevant
May 29
Elliott, when I told him I didn't know how something worked: "I know. Cause you don't know about Legos. Which is so not good."
May 30
Me: Hyperbole is the funnest thing on the planet. Margie: That's why you suck at those jelly bean things.
May 30
I just made the 7yo kill and clean up a giant spider. Cause he's the man of the house.
May 30
Elliott: Quiet! You're singing in stupid opera!
May 30
Nearly all of our school activities have ended for the year. Is it possible to have a case of Senioritis if none of us are actually seniors?
May 31
What I heard: A chihuahua barking and knocking over water. What I thought I heard: A dog turning into a puddle. #maybeiwatchtoomuchscifi
May 31
And now I have a date with some hobbits to watch the Two Towers so, dear Internet, please don't be interesting for the next 7 hours, ok?
May 31
It took me longer than you'd think to realize Pippin is the hot hobbit because he's Scottish. I may be a tad slutty for a Scottish accent.
May 31
And yes I did just use the phrase "the hot hobbit". Because Scottish.
May 31
