Many years ago, back in my former life when I was working, I attended a holiday party for our department at the Head of Admin’s home. This woman, we will call her Peg because that is her name and because I don’t give a shit if she Googles herself, was, shall we say, not my favorite person ever. She was kind of a bitch in a lot of really sick ways. Anyway, at some point during the party, my forever-friend Sandy wandered into Peg’s guest bathroom and started poking through the medicine cabinets, hoping she might find something for her contacts. Instead what she found was a bottle, clearly labeled, “POISON.” She called me into the bathroom where we giggled and probably embarrassed ourselves in a lot of interesting ways, trying to figure out what.the.fuck? Why would someone have such a thing? What kind of poison, exactly, was it? And it’s not like we could ask her – we’d violated her privacy! So we were left to wonder all these years later.
And I still don’t have the answer, so if you were hoping for some sort of end to this, then, um, sorry.
BUT! I decided to carry on the tradition. I shared some of my Thieve’s Oil with a friend who’s having tooth pain and I figured she probably did not yet have a bottle labeled, “poison” so it’s not like it would get mixed up with the others (I realize I am assuming a lot here) and this way, she has her own defense (or form of amusement) toward any nosy guests.
And why should she have all the fun? I happened to be making up a fancy cold and flu remedy to keep in the fridge this week and figured, why not? It would not all fit into the one bottle I had, so I get two! bottles of poison!
The Husband says it would be better with an “Old Timey” (technical term) label, but I, personally, think handwritten is kind of more fucked up.
